Managing a family and a household is not for the faint of heart. Everybody has their own agenda, their own wants and needs and many times us moms get stuck in the crosshairs. How on earth do you manage everything AND keep everyone happy? Is that even possible?
Of course it’s not! We moms put a lot of pressure on ourselves to do it all and make it look good, but no one can manage all the needs of the home and family while keeping everyone happy.
Oftentimes we need to take a big step back to get some perspective. Perspective can help you see things more clearly. Call a friend, your own mom or a mentor and ask them about the dynamics going on in your home. Sometimes just hearing that you’re not the only one experiencing the stresses you’re dealing with is enough to relieve some of the pressure. Other times you may hear something that you weren’t prepared for, or words that you don’t really like. In that case, say, “thank you” (whether you mean it or not – because remember, you asked!) and then let their thoughts marinate for a while. It can be hard to see the truth of our own situations sometimes.
Next, think about what might need to ‘give’ in your life in order to create margin and peace. Figure out what is causing the major strain or stress. Maybe it’s your job, maybe it has been adding another child to the mix, or the health issues of your parents or in-laws or maybe it’s just a busy season. Once you determine where the strain/stress is coming from, brainstorm how you can create margin. Quitting a job is not always feasible and of course you can’t get rid of the new child you added to the mix! But maybe you can hire some help around the house, or let go of a volunteer obligation or some additional activities that are filling your calendar.
Finally, recognize that everyone may not be happy all of the time and make peace with that. That is okay. You are not responsible for the happiness of anyone in your home but you!