When Personalities Collide in Marriage

Opposites attract and boy, can it be magical! But, in marriage what was “so cute” when you were dating can become annoying and irritating a few years in. Here are three tips to help you in your journey of marriage:

Tip #1 - Focus on Their Strengths.
Keep in mind, your spouse most likely hasn’t changed over the years, you are just noticing things more (or they are bothering you more) because you live with them 24/7.  Try not to focus on the weaknesses and instead, start praising the strengths. My mom used to tell me people respond more to honey than vinegar. (Pretty sure that’s the Southernized version of this verse!) If you are constantly scolding your husband for his irritating ways, he will more than likely shut down.  But, if you praise him for his strengths he has motivation to keep working hard on the relationship. 

Tip #2- Celebrate Your Differences.

If we were all alike it would be boring, so find a way to celebrate that your husband is so different from you! Think about it, you complete each other.  Greg is analytical, organized, thinks through every given situation that could possibly happen and is always striving to find the perfect solution in life. I on the other hand am spontaneous, always looking for the “fun” in a situation, highly relational and creative.  If you combine us together we are a dynamic duo.  Work hard to celebrate the other!

3- Communication is Key!

Don’t let little things build up and then one day you blow up! Communicate about everything and keep short accounts. If you need help knowing how to approach a difficult conversation, read this blog post or listen to this episode of Wire Talk. Greg and I are still putting these habits into practice after 30 years and believe me, they work!