The 4 Needs of a Red Personality

Let’s agree that parenting our RED children is HARD. That is okay to admit, it doesn’t mean you don’t love them! Reds control by anger and can be fiesty. They are often the one pushing back against the boundaries and rules that you are rightfully putting in place around them. Don’t be surprised by their fierceness. Oftentimes it’s not personal (I know it’s hard for my green moms to believe that!) They are just trying to get what they want. We all do it, reds just do it louder than most people.

Today I want to share four needs that RED personalities have. If you keep these needs in mind, and use them to your advantage, you can decrease the amount of conflict you are having with your strong willed kiddo.

Your RED Needs:
1. Control

Just because reds need a sense of control, it doesn’t mean they are in control. It’s all in the way we as moms position things. For instance, knowing full well you have pancakes and cereal in the kitchen and you are willing to prepare either, ask your child, “what would you like for breakfast? Cereal or pancakes? When your child responds, “I would like pancakes,” they think they are in control, but you are the one that gave them the choice. Parent smarter not harder!

2. Loyalty
Our strong-willed kiddos are SMART. They know they can be difficult, so when you stick with them and don't give up on them, it means the world to them. They need to know you will love them even though they are hard.

3. Appreciation

Sometimes our reds seem so tough that we moms feel like we can’t ever be soft with them. But on the inside, your red kiddo is dying to be told they are loved for who they are, and not what they do. Tell them often about all the good you see in them.

4. Credit for their Work

Your strong-willed kiddos respond well to praise! Use that to your advantage in coming alongside them. Reds are full of potential and if they think there's a chance for a reward, they'll rise to the occasion. Publicly praise their behavior or hard work, and they will move mountains for you.